Lord's like never before...

Being from Manchester, I was a long way removed from North-West London growing up. So, being an MCC member would be as foreign to me as the truth is to Donald Trump.

I get the feeling, though, that some of the behaviour in the Lord’s Pavilion last night might cut deeper than just sports.

I would say there is a minority in that part of the world that might always believe Australians to be inferior. That they are somehow lesser beings due to their past. I sincerely hope not; it would be plain sad if that were the case.

I just felt the need to air that.

---

Who likes whiteboards over framed pictures? Yes, not me either!

However, I do have a whiteboard on the back wall of my frigid home office. The space is a summer domain; winters in Geelong are spent in the north-facing kitchen, trying to keep warm and tap the keyboard without needing gloves.

I do drift into the office on occasion, though. And it’s here that I’ve been keeping a session-by-session Ashes series score.

The first two Tests have been laden with back-and-forth cricket, with both teams managing to counter-punch just when you think they're out for the count. The cricket has been exhilarating—I just wish I was there rather than here!

For the record, I have Australia leading the session-by-session score currently 19–13 (this Test was 11–6 in Australia’s favour). I must add that this is purely a subjective viewpoint. The argument being, this series is a lot closer than the 2–0 scoreline suggests.

---

---

Like most folk still in Australia and captivated by this Ashes series, my lot was wrapping up tight on the sofa last night, making sure the kettle was full, and trying to endure the ordinary free-to-air coverage—thank the Lord for the in-game commentary courtesy of analysts who, in the main, do not loop everything back to their own endeavours.

As can be the case in this scenario, one wishes to be put out of any misery early; please do not prolong the inevitable. A swift conclusion awaits, and the sanctuary of an electric blanket beckons.

What a warrior

Then you have Ben Stokes to contend with.

Has an English cricketer stood out from his teammates like Stokes is able to do in these situations?

Stokes competitive instincts are almost peerless on the world stage; he displays these overtly and literally wears his heart on his sleeve. The desire to win is suffocating, and Australia felt this. Make no mistake.

This Lord’s crowd was confusing. Instead of revelling in one of ‘the great innings, they chose to swap their oxford-blue shirts for a Crystal Palace jumper, and not just momentarily.

This was Stokes 13th Test hundred, and he carried the weight of his irresponsible colleagues on his broad shoulders as well as putting his adversary to the sword. Miracles come every four years, and for a time, this looked to be the case. Sadly, his innings might lose some of its gloss, as ultimately, it was a loss, and his team now stares down the barrel of a home Ashes series loss.

---

And then, Jonny Bairstow and a standing-back-stumping!

At first, I felt aggrieved, not because Bairstow was given out, but more because I wasn’t aware of the law. In fact, I had no clue. Lord knows cricket is an eternally confusing game.

On reflection, though, this particular law (20.1.2) reads definitively.

"The ball shall be considered to be dead when it is clear to the bowler’s end umpire that the fielding side and both batters at the wicket have ceased to regard it as in play."

Bairstow took it upon himself, like a Supreme Court judge might, that he alone regarded this case (or over) settled. When, clearly, his opponents and umpires didn’t.

Why Bairstow went walkabout is obvious: he’s wired tight, the over had been demanding, he craved to get on with the game, secretly wishing for Cameron Green to over-pitch—he had a booming cover drive in mind, not ducking and weaving!

Bairstow just went walkabout when he shouldn’t. And Alex Carey merely offered an underarm toss that collided with the stumps.

---

Hypocrisy abounds on both sides of the fence here.

In fact, nobody can be blamed for anything that hasn’t been done before (including Sandpapergate). Back in the day, it was called ball-tampering (ask Mike Atherton); just this time, it involved underpants and, yes, sandpaper.

The people involved here are hardened professionals who are always looking for an edge. It’s built into most of them. As Pat Cummins rightly pointed out, the victim in this incident (Bairstow), himself a wicket-keeper, did exactly the same thing to David Warner earlier in the game. Just not with the same success.

---

---

This day must be remembered for more than trivial squabbling over the self-determined virtues of ‘the spirit of cricket’.

Test matches are the sum of many different parts. Single, isolated incidents rarely determine the outcome of a game played across such a wide window.

I would charge Brendon McCullum with the task of finding those missing 43 runs over the course of five enthralling days. Circumspect analysis would locate them easily (start with the extra’s column), and more, I would suggest.

---

Finally, circling back to the crowd and the crabby members of the MCC.

Booing is the water of a duck's back, harmless really. One wag starts, and the rest follow; pay your money, and do as you please—to a point!

But—drawing the line—when you have decrepit members trying to do a ‘Nobby Stiles, by sticking out a black brogue in the hope of tripping up one of those cheating Aussies, then you have issues. MCC members are afforded the luxury of sharing immediate space with the players, but this might not remain if they repeat the misgivings of last night.

So, with that said, Once again, we have been treated to a marvellous Test match; the fire is burning bright, and we only have to wait until Thursday to start all over again.

Enjoy the game for what it is, and like me, brush up on the laws that you invoke.